It's a cliche and truism in the music business that most bands produce their best work on their first album and then go straight to Hell after that.
The thinking is this: you have your whole life to write the first album, so when it becomes a success, you tour and tour and tour until the only thing you have left to write about is: how you tour and tour and tour and do drugs and hang out backstage and have sex with groupies.
If "meta" is the highest level of learning (learning about learning!) then it's the lowest level of songwriting (singing and writing about singing and writing!). There are exceptions to the rule, but let's start with the worst of the worst, because those are the best.
I. The simply moronic:
1. Nickelback - Rockstar
Key line: "I want a brand-new house on an episode of Cribs." Everyone! Worst moment: "Been there, done that."
2. Bon Jovi - Wanted Dead or Alive
Key line: "Times when you're alone, all you do is think." Ouch! Worst moment: "I'm a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride!"
3. Deep Purple - Smoke on the Water
Key line: "Some stupid with a flare gun burned the place to the ground." Sounds reasonable to me. Worst moment: The guitar riff, sorry. Even John Bender in the Breakfast Club knew a cliche when he heard it.
4. The Ramones - Touring
Key line: "Drive, drive, drive the night away." Worst moment: Rhyming "touring" with "boring." Blitzkrieg Bop was a long, long time ago.
Hmm, I'd have to add Takin' Care of Business (HOMER: "It's BTO. They're Canada's answer to ELP. Their big hit was TCB. That's how we talked in the 70s, we didn't have a moment to spare!"). That song was primarily about how easy it is to be a musician, wasn't it?
Plus, I hear it in my head every time I crack my knuckles and sit down at my computer to get to work.
That Streets joint comes on whenever 101.5 is on autopilot, so I've grown to loathe it. I really hate to admit is, but I have a soft spot for "Wanted Dead or Alive", but only accompanied by the video. It does the exact opposite of the song, making me want to hit the road and get sweaty for the people. I hadn't paid much attention to Art Brut until Sound Opinions played that very song several episodes ago. It's a fine piece spazzy, punk-ish spontaneity. Hey...how about Dr. Hook's "On the Cover of the Rolling Stone"? Goofy goodness.
"Turn the Page" is a classic of the category (already mentioned), but how about The Who's "Long Live Rock"? And maybe Springsteen's "Tenth Avenue Freezeout", which is really more about the forming of a band (his band), but still sort of fits the theme.
And for a great and sad song about the life of a DJ (the radio kind), you can't go wrong with Harry Chapin's W*O*L*D.
Hmm, I'd have to add Takin' Care of Business (HOMER: "It's BTO. They're Canada's answer to ELP. Their big hit was TCB. That's how we talked in the 70s, we didn't have a moment to spare!"). That song was primarily about how easy it is to be a musician, wasn't it?
ReplyDeletePlus, I hear it in my head every time I crack my knuckles and sit down at my computer to get to work.
I must say, Kenton, I'm surprised you didn't mention Bob Seger's "Turn the Page", yet another song about the life of a rock star.
ReplyDeleteI'd count "Maps," though that's about one's boyfriend being in a band.
ReplyDeleteThat Streets joint comes on whenever 101.5 is on autopilot, so I've grown to loathe it.
ReplyDeleteI really hate to admit is, but I have a soft spot for "Wanted Dead or Alive", but only accompanied by the video. It does the exact opposite of the song, making me want to hit the road and get sweaty for the people.
I hadn't paid much attention to Art Brut until Sound Opinions played that very song several episodes ago. It's a fine piece spazzy, punk-ish spontaneity.
Hey...how about Dr. Hook's "On the Cover of the Rolling Stone"? Goofy goodness.
"Turn the Page" is a classic of the category (already mentioned), but how about The Who's "Long Live Rock"? And maybe Springsteen's "Tenth Avenue Freezeout", which is really more about the forming of a band (his band), but still sort of fits the theme.
ReplyDeleteAnd for a great and sad song about the life of a DJ (the radio kind), you can't go wrong with Harry Chapin's W*O*L*D.
I knew you guys would have a million of these...well done!
ReplyDelete