Eleven new words that all the hep kids are using

1. Aunty Christ - Your aunt, who upon being told that you have a fatal disease, says, "I'll pray for you."

2. Bumprov - What a cheerleader does when she can't remember the routine. 

3. Changent - A double agent.

4. Decembeard - Matt TenBruggencate's idea to replace "Movember" once and for all.

5. DisPinterest - Having no interest in new social-media apps.

 I'm unmoved. DisPinterested, if you will.

6. Fattering - Complimenting a person on his or her rotundness.

7. Fucanuck - A word uttered by one who blames Canada.

8. Manitles - Male privates. In the army. Ahem.

9. Protestexy - The glamorization of protesting. See: Time's Person of the Year.

10. Voluntold - "I was voluntold by my mother to take out the garbage."

11. Walmartians - The alien species found aimlessly wandering the aisles of multinational retailers.

Bumprov at :24.