A dozen new words to the wise-ass

 Do all the work. Pay us. F- off. (See number 12).

1. Anticipointment - Awaiting inevitable disappointment. 

2. Anuary - January: the month you freeze your arse off.

3. Barbadass - Arriving back from Barbados with a larger "trunk" than when you left.

4. Deutschbag - The place you put your German garbage.

5. Enterpride - Bragging about your new business.

6. Fistmas - The day you open presents and feel depressed.

7. Kention - Thanks for the shout-out!

8. Misfaithed - "I have utmost faith in this policy." "It is misfaithed, bonehead."
 
9. Quilty - Feeling bad that you have no marketable skills when someone gives you an elaborate, homemade quilt.

10. Ricktum - Body part found near the caucus. 

11. Scamsung - A Samsung product that looks like an Apple product.

12. Self-Serving Checkout - The checkout at Sobeys, where the store gets you to do all the work and gives you no pay.